Presence…explained with a TIP

Last night, I found myself in a situation that many of us know all too well. I had crafted a short story to share with brand-new parents on Instagram, got sidetracked by mum duties, picked up my phone again, and in a flurry of closing apps, I accidentally deleted it. Feel free to share a hearty laugh with me! Undeterred, this morning, I decided to share the heart of my message: ‘Practice Single Tasking.’

As any new parent will tell you, waking up to a to-do list a mile long is common, sometimes even before breakfast. This overwhelm can chip away at your confidence as you roll out of bed. Or, perhaps, sleep was elusive with a little one demanding feeds every 2–3 hours, just as you're dozing off. Single tasking becomes essential here because it allows you to concentrate on one thing at a time.

I’m not saying to focus fully on watching your washing machine—that could be on a timer. Instead, allow yourself to eat once the baby naps. Eating is the single task worth focusing on. Especially for breastfeeding mothers in those early months, it’s crucial. You’re providing the sole source of nutrition for another being's brain, physical, and emotional growth—a huge task! I highlight eating because nourishment is vital. If you don't find the time to eat and replenish, your energy levels deplete, leading you to feel down. This cascade affects your ability to focus and erodes your confidence in navigating your new role.

So why prioritise “Single Tasking”? Multitasking, often seen as a talent, is a productivity foe. I learned this from Dr. Amen, though I don’t have the exact page, but here’s a [link](https://www.verywellmind.com/multitasking-2795003#:~:text=Multitasking%20takes%20a%20serious%20toll,effective%20approach%20for%20several%20reasons.) for further reading. If you can dedicate just 20–30 minutes to eat when the baby is asleep, it’s more beneficial than juggling lunch, errands, and feeding times.

Time flies, and days seem short. This is where seeking help plays into self-care. Many people are willing to lend a hand—you just have to ask. Stepping outside your comfort zone to request help can be a game-changer for you and your baby. Older adults especially enjoy spending time with infants, or you might call on a friend or neighbour for assistance. My neighbour, having been a parent herself, understood the value of small gestures.

Practicing single tasking didn't come naturally to me. I was always racing against the clock. Yet, the moments spent being truly present with my awake baby became invaluable. Those interactions are essential for emotional development. Recognising this importance fuelled my drive to seek help, accept it, and celebrate small victories each day.

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Emotional Impact of Parental Fights